Amanda's Story...
In the final weeks before Shaymus was born, doubt started to set in.
Doubt fueled by a previous birth full of intervention left my mind
wondering "Will my body do this? Will I labor spontaneously? Will my
uterus contract on its own? Will I feel an urge to push? Can I push this
baby out and into the world?"
On the night before Shaymus was born, I held my 19 month old son in
my arms lying across my large pregnant belly at 41 weeks. I cradled him in
my arms before laying him down to sleep, and I apologized. I apologized
for having not been as educated about childbirth and what I wanted from
his birth when it was his time to come. I apologized for carrying guilt and
pain based on the uncertainties I felt about his birth that eventually
manifested itself into a scar across my abdomen. I apologized for all that
had been just before the moment we all became a family. I apologized,
and then I kissed my son's forehead and said "You will always be my
baby."
Shaymus is my VBAC baby. And this is his birth story.
After putting Remy to bed, Nate and I curled up on the couch together.
We napped for about 3 hours when I awoke at 11pm having contractions.
Our doula, Jessica, had asked that we call her when the contractions were
10 minutes apart. In her Bradley class, we had learned of a website called
contractionmaster.com where you can time contractions more easily. We
started using it, and soon realized my contractions were patterned at
about 5 minutes apart and lasting about 30 seconds. We called Jessica at
around 1am.
Now, having never labored naturally (my first labor was augmented with
Pitocin), I was quite calm with her over the phone, and tolerating the pain
quite well. She and Nate were both sure it would be a while until this baby
arrived. With guidance to get rest and try to sleep, we let Jessica go to
try to do the same.
There was no sleep to be had however. The pain grew longer and harder
with each contraction. I curled my body around the birth ball in the corner
and closed my eyes. When I felt the pain growing even more intense, I
went outside. I walked up and down the walkway in front of our house in
the evening air. At 3am, we called Jessica again. While on the phone with
her, I had 3 contractions very close together and my demeanor had totally
change. Jessica advised to call the midwife right away and she was on her
way.
Now, I have a son, who does this thing I like to call "selling me down the
river". I have company, and he screams and cries until the second they
walk out the door and he is an angel. He starts talking and repeating all
the words you can imagine and you ask him to say something for Grams
and he clams up and wont say a word. Well, Shaymus followed suit right
here. He sold me down the river! I dial the midwife and say "My
contractions are 2 minutes apart and lasting about a minute." She keeps
me on the phone asking questions, this and that, and presumably
wondering her likelihood of going back to sleep in her own bed that night.
The whole time, not a single contraction. Nothing. Minutes passed. I even
joked that she should stay on the phone with me because clearly that is
what it took to give me a break in this pain. Then—it hit me! Contractions
overlapping and so intense I tossed the phone aside and crumbled to the
floor, and sent Nate for a bucket because I felt the need to vomit. Midwife
is on her way. My water broke seconds later. Seconds after that, my legs
started to shake, and I was ready to push this baby out. No one was here
yet.
Nate called Jessica who advised to get me lying down in bed. We wanted
no help from gravity! Now, this is the part that gets a little frenzied and
fuzzy for me. Our midwife arrived at 3:40am, followed shortly by Jessica.
Nate and Jessica ran about the house for a bit making sure the midwife
had everything she needed. Our midwife sat on the bed and with one leg
on her shoulder and the other pressed against her knee, I held my
husband's hand and pushed our baby out into the world at 4:15am—just
5 hours after that first contraction that woke me.
It was a beautiful moment. We did it! We did it! You did a great job baby
boy! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you for this! I love you.
Then, my 19 month old son came to welcome his baby brother. Welcome
to our family Shaymus Nathan Arnold. You have strengthened my heart
and healed my wounds. I am the strongest woman I can be because of
your brother's birth. I am the warmest person I can be because of your
birth. And I am the most fortunate woman in the world to have the
support of your father and such a beautiful family.
Amanda & Nate, Parents to Shaymus and his brother Remy
Natural homebirth after cesarean (HBAC)
In the final weeks before Shaymus was born, doubt started to set in.
Doubt fueled by a previous birth full of intervention left my mind
wondering "Will my body do this? Will I labor spontaneously? Will my
uterus contract on its own? Will I feel an urge to push? Can I push this
baby out and into the world?"
On the night before Shaymus was born, I held my 19 month old son in
my arms lying across my large pregnant belly at 41 weeks. I cradled him in
my arms before laying him down to sleep, and I apologized. I apologized
for having not been as educated about childbirth and what I wanted from
his birth when it was his time to come. I apologized for carrying guilt and
pain based on the uncertainties I felt about his birth that eventually
manifested itself into a scar across my abdomen. I apologized for all that
had been just before the moment we all became a family. I apologized,
and then I kissed my son's forehead and said "You will always be my
baby."
Shaymus is my VBAC baby. And this is his birth story.
After putting Remy to bed, Nate and I curled up on the couch together.
We napped for about 3 hours when I awoke at 11pm having contractions.
Our doula, Jessica, had asked that we call her when the contractions were
10 minutes apart. In her Bradley class, we had learned of a website called
contractionmaster.com where you can time contractions more easily. We
started using it, and soon realized my contractions were patterned at
about 5 minutes apart and lasting about 30 seconds. We called Jessica at
around 1am.
Now, having never labored naturally (my first labor was augmented with
Pitocin), I was quite calm with her over the phone, and tolerating the pain
quite well. She and Nate were both sure it would be a while until this baby
arrived. With guidance to get rest and try to sleep, we let Jessica go to
try to do the same.
There was no sleep to be had however. The pain grew longer and harder
with each contraction. I curled my body around the birth ball in the corner
and closed my eyes. When I felt the pain growing even more intense, I
went outside. I walked up and down the walkway in front of our house in
the evening air. At 3am, we called Jessica again. While on the phone with
her, I had 3 contractions very close together and my demeanor had totally
change. Jessica advised to call the midwife right away and she was on her
way.
Now, I have a son, who does this thing I like to call "selling me down the
river". I have company, and he screams and cries until the second they
walk out the door and he is an angel. He starts talking and repeating all
the words you can imagine and you ask him to say something for Grams
and he clams up and wont say a word. Well, Shaymus followed suit right
here. He sold me down the river! I dial the midwife and say "My
contractions are 2 minutes apart and lasting about a minute." She keeps
me on the phone asking questions, this and that, and presumably
wondering her likelihood of going back to sleep in her own bed that night.
The whole time, not a single contraction. Nothing. Minutes passed. I even
joked that she should stay on the phone with me because clearly that is
what it took to give me a break in this pain. Then—it hit me! Contractions
overlapping and so intense I tossed the phone aside and crumbled to the
floor, and sent Nate for a bucket because I felt the need to vomit. Midwife
is on her way. My water broke seconds later. Seconds after that, my legs
started to shake, and I was ready to push this baby out. No one was here
yet.
Nate called Jessica who advised to get me lying down in bed. We wanted
no help from gravity! Now, this is the part that gets a little frenzied and
fuzzy for me. Our midwife arrived at 3:40am, followed shortly by Jessica.
Nate and Jessica ran about the house for a bit making sure the midwife
had everything she needed. Our midwife sat on the bed and with one leg
on her shoulder and the other pressed against her knee, I held my
husband's hand and pushed our baby out into the world at 4:15am—just
5 hours after that first contraction that woke me.
It was a beautiful moment. We did it! We did it! You did a great job baby
boy! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you for this! I love you.
Then, my 19 month old son came to welcome his baby brother. Welcome
to our family Shaymus Nathan Arnold. You have strengthened my heart
and healed my wounds. I am the strongest woman I can be because of
your brother's birth. I am the warmest person I can be because of your
birth. And I am the most fortunate woman in the world to have the
support of your father and such a beautiful family.
Amanda & Nate, Parents to Shaymus and his brother Remy
Natural homebirth after cesarean (HBAC)
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Trusting Our Bodies
For more information on The Bradley Method®, for an international listing of instructors or to contact the American Academy of
Husband-Coached Childbirth® directly, please contact: The Bradley Method®, Box 5224 Sherman Oaks, CA 91413-5224, 1-800-4-A-BIRTH
or 1-818-788-6662, www.bradleybirth.com
Husband-Coached Childbirth® directly, please contact: The Bradley Method®, Box 5224 Sherman Oaks, CA 91413-5224, 1-800-4-A-BIRTH
or 1-818-788-6662, www.bradleybirth.com
| Natural Childbirth Classes & Birth Doula Services |
| Amanda pushed her baby out and Nate caught him putting him immediately on her belly. Here they greet him with joy! |
| After holding and bonding with her baby and letting him breastfeed a bit, the midwife did the newborn exam an hour and a half later. |
| Baby Shaymus sleeping a few hours after birth. |